i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
you never un-have a 4some
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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