thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
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