why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
