to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
