He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Found your dick twin last night
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize