you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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