Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
