My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Randomize
