party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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