So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
