come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
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