i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
