Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
