dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize
