omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Randomize
