Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
We have so much sex to catch up on
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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