dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
