I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
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