I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
