no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
