Is it normal to miss your booty call?
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
