You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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