if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
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