If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
