he thought i was a dude.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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