grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
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