Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
