I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize