4 words: hood of his car
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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