im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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