i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
tell me about the eggs
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
