the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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