And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Randomize
