Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize