I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
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