i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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