You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize