Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize