Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
