dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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