Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
