why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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