he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
