She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
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