would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize