she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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