ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
