in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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