I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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