the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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